The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life. (Proverbs 31:11-12)
The heart of her husband trusts her … that’s an interesting way to say it. Not just he trusts her, but his heart trusts her. Not just his mind, but all the way down to his core. The King James version says he “safely trusts” in her and the NIV says he has “full confidence” in her.
Where does that kind of trust come from? Probably from what comes next. She does him good and not harm.
So many marriages are more like sibling rivalries after the honeymoon is over. “He did …” “She did …” They end up with a list of hurts that builds so that every new hurt doesn’t stand on it’s own anymore – it’s added to the others and becomes much more painful than it needs to. And even when they try to deal with one hurt it’s complicated by all the others added to it. One huge hurt.
“She does him good” has a lot to do with a state of mind. She wants to do him good. She looks for ways to do him good.
That word good can also be translated benefit. To safely trust – to trust at all – requires keeping short accounts. Dealing with things quickly so they don’t build. And (remember the army idea) standing together against all enemies (allies, not rivals). It also requires a mind set on his benefit. Looking for ways to help him succeed. Looking for ways to do him good.
Trust doesn’t just happen, it’s built.